spring: she's fabulous

6:04pm: Hey gays
On Saturday the 12th of August, I'm having a party and you're not invited.

Of course by "not invited" I mean "invited"! Hooray for you!

Some of you may remember the big party of 2003, it was fucking fantastic. Still talked about now by loads of people, uh huh, and by loads of people I mean me and Gorfy.

Its BYOBSBFF, for those of you who are less informed that is bring your own bottle, sleeping bag, food and fun.

There will be a bit of food and drink but not as much asthe last one because my mum is a selfish bitch who felt the need to start a new life in Florida, thus I am no longer hooked up with the free stuff. (grrr etc)

Uhm, leave a comment or catch me on msn or something if you're interested

6:39pm: Pah
I've decided I don't like my LJ name, so I have a new journal http://www.livejournal.com/users/springyk/ add me :-D

6:16pm: I'm bored
entertain me.

3:46pm: Hmm
What is a dutch oven?

1:43pm: Who'd want a kidney from me?

Dear Santa... Dear Santa, This year I've been busy! In April I punched tr_wolf in the arm (-10 points). In August chayat and I robbed a bank (-50 points). Last Friday I helped magic_steve hide a body (-173 points). Last Sunday I bought porn for latran (10 points). In May I gave muffspangler a kidney (1000 points). Overall, I've been nice (777 points). For Christmas I deserve a pony! Sincerely, ickledemon

Write your letter to Santa! Enter your LJ username:

Burfdl got a spanking and all I get is a lousy pony?!

5:48pm: Have you accepted Vagina as your personal Lord and Savior?
Sooo, spent the week end at Gorfy's with the gays. Pika, Pawz, Emejn, Niko, Latran, Yukai, Chayat and of course Gofry.

Was pretty cool really. I got too drunk on Friday night though, ending up in a hilarious fisting situation.

We walked round town and did some bowling on Saturday, I just watched though, although I could have played, because Yukai's horrendousness would have saved me any embarrassment.

Chayat bought some lovely penis shaped ginger bread.

Party was pretty slow at first, with people upstairs on the computer and the gayest drinking game ever. I can't remember what the film was called, but it had so much tentacle rape it was unbelievable, anyway, we were on two teams and one had to drink when they saw the left nipple and the other the right. I was right nipple team leader. The drunkest person would have won... So me, really, but we stopped playing because it was just too slow. Then came Trivia Pursuit. I love that game, not when playing against gorfy though because he wins far too much, we think he stays in of an evening and memorizes all the cards. However, we won, because Emejn was on our (mine and Chay's) team, and he is the fountain of all useless knowledge, maybe some useful knowledge too. We only won with two pies though because everyone else had had enough, but we still won. Then everyone fucked off upstairs, probably to have some kind of communal gay sex orgy furry yiff thing., leaving me, Emejn and Chay to ask each other trivia Pursuit questions until we were all trivia 'd out. Then came many many episodes of King of the Hill, but emejn wouldn't let me watch the last one... Something about not wanting to crash the car on the way home.

Then, just to bring me down after a good week end, I dropped my vodka as i was getting out of the car. So, my plans for tonight (stay in, get pissed) have been reduced to... Stay in.

I'm so skint now though, I've got a whole 30 pence to live on till the 15th. Well, I've got 15 squids in the bank, but I need to leave it in for my screenselect direct debit thing, I think I might have to stop doing that because I'm not getting the great deal I thought I was... I would be if I lived near a post box though. Hmmm.

Oh and...

Stop covering your house in Christmas lights, you chav cunts.

12:55am: Aww, pink bunnies.

9:55am: My new big pants stick right out the top of my jeans, really far, it scares me.

3:25pm: Yay!
I read ronnie's book last night, very good! I'm in it!! I already knew I was in it, because I made him put me in it, but my part rocks so hard! I'm a fur, a bunny of course, and I'm a hermit who lives in a cellar called 'The warren'. I think I'm probably more excited than Ronnie is about the whole book.

It even made me cry... Three times! Once at a veryveryvery sad bit because of all the veryveryvery sadness of course and because I knew it was true... and once when I died, how vain am I?! I forget the third.

Anyway I am a very happy bunny.

4:50pm: Yes, he's much like the pope in that respect!
ZOMG!

How long do old people take to do food shopping?

I hardly ever do a big shop, but my Gran does one about every other day and it always takes her about 3 hours.

I went with her today and I was done in 15 mins getting my bits, grapes, olives, vodka etc, essentials, but we were in there for hours. I swear, he left me next to the mixed nuts while she went off to get baby corns... 20 minutes later she's still off.

Oh, how I long for the days when I can drive. Bring me the driving licence.

10:49pm: If I had some milk I could make a cup of tea...If I had some tea bags.
I always crave tea when I have no milk, like now. Please bring milk.

Also I have bitch ass toothache. The nasty face DR isn't taking the teeth out until Aprilish. Maybe he'll fix my nose while I'm under. Stupid nose. (I fell on it drunk a few weeks ago and now it's all big and even more roman and has a big scar.) Must remember to go see the GP about it.



I'm so lazy. I'm only just up and I went to bed at about 9amish.


We're burying Gomez tomorrow. In one of those tubs you get from the chinese take away. He loved prawn cracker, bless his little... Uh... Lack of cotton socks.

I wish I had more to say, then I wouldn't be as bored for the next 14 hours until sleep.

springy

6:00am: Poor Gomez.
I just went to pick him up and the poor sod is dead.

I'm not not having much luck with the old rodents with Flump going at 8 months and Gomez at.. Well.. Not even three months old. I never even got any pictures of him.

Meg had to be put down today aswell.

So it's all a bit crap and R.I.P Gomez and Meg.

10:51pm: Yay! I always knew it!

Shiver me timbers you know loads about pirate
vocabulary matey so Splice the Mainbrace and
celebrate!yoho!{please vote}


A "m.a.d." quiz: pirate vocabulary
brought to you by Quizilla

7:48pm: Look at all the pretty words, mummy.

4:48pm: Listen up, fuckers.
I need a "friend" to take to my Mum's wedding in feb.

It's a fabulous deal really, you get free passage from my house to Newark and back. Open bar, Hotel room for the night... All you have to do is put up with me :D... So volunteers and answers on a postcard please.

4:04pm: Dreamydream
I had the worst nightmare. Ever!

First of all me, Ronnie and a really cute taxi driver went to tesco to buy some vodka, as we used to do, but then we couldn't find what we wanted so we went in to the garden (I don't know why Tesco had a garden.) and fell asleep on Ronnie's dad... I don't think it was really Ronnie's dad because I've never met him. Anyway, we woke up at 11 and start going "WTF, mate, why did we fall asleep at such a crucial time?!" (because you can't buy booze after 11). So then we went out the front of Tesco and had another nap to pass the time until we could buy vodka. The time came but Ronnie had gone. Bloody cunt. So then I went back in and I found the vodka this time, but I couldn't reach it! I was busy running around trying to find someone taller than me to reach it,but i couldn't :(


Thankfully muffspangler phoned me and it was all over, but for some reason I told him I "was having an amazing dream!" wtf?!

springykins

4:01pm: Bored
<td align="center">Kindness


Kindness is most important in a boyfriend/girlfriend. You want someone who will go through everything with you - the best moments and the worst, and all of those other moments in between. You love to be able to say anything to your partner, and have them say anything to you. You are able to be extremely close with your partner for that reason.


Take this quiz at QuizGalaxy.com</td>

That sounds very soppy. I'm not.

8:20pm: Shut up.
So, I'm back to sleeping the day away again. It is surprising how easy it is to fall in to, unlike a normal sleeping pattern. Stupid sleep.

The mean corset lady on ebay isn't replying to my e mails. So I picked a new one. http://www.galleryserpentine.com/longlinefemmefatale.html

On another note... I hate the internet. Everyone I know knows everyone I know and it gets worse everyday.


Awww, July and Ruby on Eastenders is kinda sweet... Very miss-matched, but sweet.

Anyway, time to get back to coughing over everything.

springles

5:48pm: Get on up like a sex machine.
You should all listen to www.catnip-radio.com for it is funky.

My new keyboard came today, it's pink!!! It makes me flow a river in my pants, but is odd typing on it, because it's flat and squidgey.
http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=5823034997&rd=1&sspagename=STRK%3AMEWN%3AIT&rd=1 look at the pretty.

The trip to Ikea proved fruitful, as in I got all of my chrimble shopping done... Well, apart from my granddad and my brother, but my granddad is hard to shop for, books on the english language normally prove to be a big hit with him... and as for my brother, he lives in Florida now and I won't be seeing him till my mum's wedding in Feb, so no rush there.

Ikea still managed to piss me off though, with it's being the size of a small country and stupid names for things... i bought a lamp called Lista.

Ikea made me buy yummy gherkins and tiny dime bars which gave me a poorly tummy, so damn them to hell even more now.

In other news, I got called 'spunkbunny' on the radio thanks to Richard... damn him to hell with ikea.

Buy me presents.

springythingy.

3:54am: Hoorah
Click here.
Take the quiz.
Post your results.
( See ickledemon's results. )

2:59am: bonjour
My hair is a disaster. It was meant to be pink and black. The hair gods did look down on me and say "NO! Ginger and black is the only way!"

Other than that I'm just pretty bored. So bored that I watched Alice in Wonderland... and played the crappy games in the bonus features.

Woo Ikea tomorrow. I really really hate Ikea. More than I hate... Freaky. That's how much I hate Ikea.

I wonder if this post could get any more boring? I think it just did. Crap.


Ooooooo, before I forget, I picked out my chrimble pressie from my gran today.

This corset http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/BN-Sexy-BROCADE-Busk-CORSET-made-to-measure-GOTH_W0QQitemZ5438770786QQcategoryZ53334QQtcZphotoQQcmdZViewItem (not sure about the busky bit yet though) in this material/colour http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/BN-Sexy-Underbust-SATIN-LACE-CORSET-MADE-TO-MEASURE_W0QQitemZ5443603269QQcategoryZ53336QQtcZphotoQQcmdZViewItem

Je ne peux pas attendre.

3:24pm: OMG
Fantastic weekend.

Went to York to see Anna. Who is a big ball of love <3.

I went on Saturday, it takes too fucking long to get to York on the train. 4 hours and I had to walk about a gajillion miles in Newark from Newark Castle to Newark Northgate or some such nonsense.

Anyhow... Got there at 3 ish and didn't have a mobile with me because I broke my charger, so got a bit panicky and left stupid messages on her answering machine from the phone box. Fun for all, I think you'll agree. Then I saw her car... Parking about a million people out of the station since she'd parked in the drop off/pick up zone thing and wondered off in to the station. Anyway, she found me being all lost and took me to her house.

Her house where she has 10 thousand cats. I only liked 7 of them though.

There was much drinking and then a chap called Jim came round, he was pretty funky and had a nice nose, but not as funky and Jym.

Thing is, I don't remember -anything- after that until the next day when I woke up on a sofa.

Sunday brought much lazing around and a Sunday dinner that people would kill for I'm sure, only I couldn't eat because of all the god damned drugs. I'm only really a drugs on special occasions kinda gal, and it was, kinda... I'm a light weight and over did it (Which led to a fun adventure on Tuesday.)

Monday brought more drugs and ace food that I couldn't eat and more alcomahol and more fun. Me and Anna stayed up all night on the computer, chatiing and being silly, was ace.

Had to bugger off on Tuesday because I had to go and have my face xrayed. The drive home took only an hour and a bit, because Anna drives like a beast.

So anyway, got home and had a row with my gran but I can't remember what about... Next thing I know my whole family are at my door, and my neighbours and my gran's neighbours and my mum's giving me 20000 pounds and asking her to move to florida with her. Then Ronnie and Gnu are at my window and Gnu is proposing and I'm like WTF, mate... So then I go out side to see them but they have all vanished, but I can hear them in my neighbours house so I go round and knock on the door and the old man answers and he's like "What are you doing here" and I say "is my mum here?"... "Uh no, I think you've had a bit too much to drink, go home and sleep it off" so I'm all like "fuck this, I'm off home" so I walk home and when I get in I suddenly think... Was I just sleep walking?!!!

It was so messed up! Cool though, I sleep smoked and even put my jacket on before I went out... I did forget to put my shoes on though.

Anyway, nuff now.

Love you loads like frogs and toads.

8:14am: Motherfucker.
Anyway, it's 8am, and I'm bored and I was reading Gorfy's journal and fantasizing about him, as you do, and I realized that I hadn't posted for a while... Apart from the whole not drinking thing. What was I thinking? I only lasted 3 weeks because I went to a party and who doesn't drink at a party. I mean, even Dot Cotton has a sherri on special occasions. and Tuesdays.

Problem is, I don't actually have anything to say, so I might just babble for a while.

For some strange reason I'm narrating this in Gorfy's voice. Damn his girlish good looks! I'm such a lesbian.

Hah, before I sat down, I fell over a wire and the keyboard went flying and so did flump's cage. To a hamster, that must be like an earthquake. I wonder if he needs some aid. I think he'll be okay, he popped his head out of his nest, inspected the new 4 inch gap between the nest and the wall and then went back to bed. What a lazy bastard.

Mmm Marlboro reds, a manly cigarette for a manly man like me.

I think I need a cleaner, I haven't actually worn a pair of socks for about 2 months now... Well save the other week when I wore my emergency pair because Rich came round.

Rich, he's a card. He's from Liverpool and he likes to make things up, he only makes funny things up though, if he didn't make things up, we'd pretty much be bored when he came round. Once when he came round, he made me clean my TV because it was too dusty... Then I banned him from my house for about 4 months. That'll teach him.

What else can I write about?

Oh yes, I have run out of fruit loops, so if anyone in America reads my journal, please send me some more. Some saltines would be nice too.... and some captain crunch. Oh, and some Aunt whatsherface's pancake mix. That'll do for now.

Ooo, my mum's moving to Florida soon, why would anyone want to move to Florida? It's full of children and old people. So really... it just smells of soiled nappies. She's getting married in january too, she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Fuck that shit right off, love. I'll come to your little "wedding" and drink your "alcohol" but I'm not being a "bridesmaid" for no one.... Well, maybe if Flump and Timmy ever decide to have a cross animal, gay wedding... They are my babies, if they asked, I'd just have to, really.

Flump's awake again now, I think he might have realized that there was an earthquake and he's inspecting the damage... Or just chewing on the cage because he likes it.

I think it might be about time for sleep, nightynight.

12:44pm: Day 2.
"Day two of what?" I hear you ask. I'm giving up alcohol for a month. Why? Because I'm not the best drunk in the world at the best of time, but lately I've been very sad and mixed with alcohol it seems to turn in to 100% anger and it makes me say retarded things. So, the next ime I have a tipple will be on the day I celebrate my birthday. Hooray. Now the cat is clawing my leg, so I must dash.

4:26am: Hoorah
I laughed the hardest I've ever laughed this morning. All because of this!

Spring - none of your bees wax
cyax - k
StealthFox - i bet they do
Spring - lmao
StealthFox - i bet he has lots of waxy bees
cyax - O>o
StealthFox - :P
Spring - i can't stop fucking laughing now lol